Expectations...

So I was talking to a friend concerning human relationship, one of the topic that popped up was the act of being shallow. Its true, everyone wants something that's nice, a friend once said "2 car side by side, one being a beat up junk, one is a Ferrari, I am sure everyone will choose the Ferrari". Sad, but true. Everyone is shallow, and yes its nice to have pretty and nice thing. But, the question is can you afford it?

A lot of people seem to have overlooked affordability and expectation. Plenty of people out there wants a Ferrari but can only afford a Civic (yes I love picking on the Civic). But they don't actually just "WANT" it, they think that they can actually GET it for that price.

Second example, a real story: A friend of mine (Lets call him Tom) was in the market looking for a house. I didn't know at first, he came back telling us this story. I still can't wrap my head around what he was thinking. He started looking around, found an open house around the Post road area, one of those three garages home. Walk in, talk to the sales agent, looked around. The house was listed for $700K. He made an offer of $350K, obviously, they turned down that offer, the sales agent was pretty upset with him for wasting their time. Tom called us out complaining and said "I was being serious, I don't think the house worth 700K". Ok, so it doesn't worth 700K, but I would imagine it worth at least 600K then? Dude, you are offering half of what they wanted of course they won't sell it to you! Tom won't stop complaining and said he can only afford 350K. Well HELLO? Were you smoking something good to even have the guts to step inside the house with only 350K? You have courage man..... Unrealistic? Seem so

Yet another example: My friend's brother (Ken - Alias only) graduated college 2 years ago. Found a job as a junior programmer after, still a Junior programmer. Got upset with the company for not promoting him after 2 years. Started applying outside of the organization, he was applying for Team Leader and Manager roles. Didn't get a single phone call. An agent contacted him, presented an opportunities for a Programmer (Not junior, just Programmer), he got upset and was half yelling at the other side. Let see, you have 2 years of work experience (in the IT field, it take at least 3 to move up each level), and you want to jump at least 3 level while you yell at people who is helping you to find a job.. you are lucky you actually HAVE a job now with that attitude. Do you even know what you have and what the outside world is asking for? You might as well apply to be the CEO of IBM, I don't think you need a lot of brain to fulfill that task anyways, so you may qualify... c'mon, start thinking with 1/4 of your brain and you will know that

I somewhat think that human relation is almost the same way. How we treat people and how much we can offer others around us is a direct reflection of what to expect from others. The act of being shallow is not just shallow, its also selfish. The "overly high" expectation is pretty much - I will give you this much, but you have to give me THIS MUCH.

Now when I say "Shallow" and "Expectation", its not just the appearance I am referring to, but it can be bit and pieces of another human - Appearance, character, personality, wealth, health etc. I am not suggesting that relationship needs to be a fair trade, but your expectation needs to be realistic.

Ask not what others will look like, or what others can do for you... but what you have to offer and willing to offer, then you will know what you should be asking for......